Sponsor a Box(s)

There are many ways to assist and help our organization and we particularly love this idea and wanted to share. Although Lanee's Legacy began in remembrance of DeLanee, it is something that we would like ALL moms, families and supporters to feel a part of. Last fall, we received a very generous donation from a loving family who wanted to do something in their baby's honor, Gavin Macrae. We received a check in the amount of $1,000 to our organization. We were overwhelmed with their generosity and wanted anyone who received a box to know that the box that they were receiving was made possible because of Gavin. Since that time, we have donated 40 boxes in his name to our list of hospitals.

This is what 40 boxes looks like:

When a mom receives a box, she will notice on the bottom of the box that a fellow mom who has also experienced a loss gave back to her. I hope that when she sees this that she will know that she is not alone. That she will feel the love that Gavin's family had for her by helping her to receive a box.

One of the labels on 40 of Gavin's boxes:

If your interested in doing this, here is how the numbers break down. One box costs approximately $25.00 to create and fill. When we hold a box making, we put together 40 boxes. . .which equals $1,000.00. We welcome your sponorship in the form of just one box or you can host a box making night by helping us to complete 40 boxes. We have also received donations from businesses who would like to show mother's their support in this same way. Recently, Drs. Bock and Connel at American Family Chiropractic and Rehab also donated $1,000.00 in which we will put a label on the bottom of the box so that mother's know that their business is one that cares for them and what they are going through. If you have any questions about this or would like to host a box making night, please don't hesitate to contact us.

************************************************************************************ On another note, our two box making nights for the month of April will take place in Snowflake Arizona. A portion of the boxes we put together will remain in the White Mountain area at Summit Hospital and the rest will be distributed to valley hospitals. If you live in the White Mountain area and would like to come, here's the details of these box making nights:

- Thursday, April 28th at 6:30 p.m. will take place at the LDS Chapel by Pioneer Park in Snowflake, AZ.

- Saturday, April 30th at 9:00 a.m. will take palce at the LDS Chapel near the golf course in Snowflake, AZ.

Snowflake and Taylor is actually where a lot of the Lanee's Legacy board members have grown up and still have roots to. I just love how in small towns, no specific address is needed. Directions are always given in the form of "go past the big oak tree, turn right after the cattle guard and then left when you see Mr. Flake's old red horse". HA! Totally off the subject though, right?

Anyway, feel free to come, participate and bring whoever you would like. Can't wait to visit our home town and put these boxes together with so many familiar faces!

Box Making in Suprise, Arizona

A few weeks ago we went to Suprise, Arizona to do a box making with Kami Perry and some of her friends who have also lost babies. You may remember Kami from her sharing the story of her sweet boy Kooper right before our breakfast fundraiser.

This was a different experience for us. It was very tender. We have been to box makings before knowing that their had been moms who had received a box, or, experienced the loss of a baby. What is different about this one is that their were 4 mothers who had all had a loss within the last 2 years!! We were so sad to hear this. They invited those women to tell the stories of their babies before we got started. We really enjoyed the opportunity to listen to them as they shared their stories. They all did so wonderful. I know it was very hard for some of them. Their was one lady who's loss was very, very recent and raw and we appreciate all of them. You could tell that they were very tight knit and you could see how their trials had brought them closer and how they have leaned on each other and helped each other through the challenging moments.

Below (left to right) in between the black shirts are:

Cheri, Jessica, Kami and Christy:

Kami's blog has much better pictures than what we ended up with, so I'd like for you to visit her blog to see how our night went and hear her perspective of doing the boxes. You can see it here. Christy, who has received a box, also has blogged about this night and you can view it here.

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If you are interested in attending a box making night like the one above, we want you to feel welcome to come. I know this is short notice, but we have two box makings in Feburary and they are coming up pretty quick

The first one is on Thursday, February 10th, in Queen Creek at 7:00 p.m. The address is: 22424 S Meridian Rd., Queen Creek, AZ 85142.

The second one is Tuesday, February 15th in North Mesa at 7:00 p.m. The directions I have is that it is at the 68th block of Preston in NE Mesa. 1 block west of Power and north of McDowell.

Happy Birthday DeLanee - 7 Years

It's a special day for Lanee's Legacy. It was 7 years ago today that the inspiration behind this organization was born. Today, DeLanee would be 7 years old.

We had a box making a couple of nights ago where Sandy Harenberg who is the bereavement coordinator at Banner Good Samaritan Hospital attended. She experienced the loss of her daughter, Casey, 25 years ago. 25 years! Wow! I can't yet wrap my mind around grieving my daughter for that many years - although I know I will. She spoke for us that night and told us how each year has changed for her. Her eyes were full of tears as she told us, "this is 25 years you guys". "It's been 25 years and I am standing here crying". She went on to say that she doesn't cry every day, but that she is still very much effected by the life of her daughter. She says as a nurse that she must enter into the computer her patient's birthdates and that every time she enters a date of "1985" she remembers that it could be her daughter having a baby (or losing a baby). Those little reminders.

This is us with Sandy and also Brock Sherwood who helped

with this box making night to complete his Eagle Scout project:

I told Sandy that I had just passed kindergarten. She's not only has passed that stage, but also her daughter being old enough to drive a car, graduate high school, get married and now old enough to have babies. Old enough for her to have grandbabies.

I'm amazed at the past 7 years. How they've flown by, but at times, stood still. I'm thankful for every moment of this experience that I've been able to have. It has been the hardest sweetest experience I have ever had and believe I probably ever will. My daughter has changed me and made me into who I am today. I'm thankful for the lessons I've learned and who she's helped me to become. I know I have so far to go, but am thankful for where I am. She's brought our family closer together. She's changed not only me, but my living children, my marriage and those who have been touched by her.

Before she came into my life, I was a different person. I feel stronger in knowing that I was able to overcome one of the most dificult experiences in my life. Throughout these past seven years I have felt loved from so many different people and places as I've shared my story. This love that I have been so blessed to feel is the same love that we as volunteers hope to include in each one of our boxes that we donate. Losing a child is such an extremely difficult thing to endur, but I hope that by receiving one of Lanee's Legacy's boxes that they not only feel loved by a fellow mother who has walked their same road, but feel uplifted in knowing that they are not alone as they do.

When I had DeLanee, Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, wasn't yet in existence. I am thankful for the pictures I was able to get and for my mom who was smart enough to coax me into getting some of the ones that I did. I do wish I could have had a professional there to help me capture some of our moments together. I also had always wished for a video. Well, this year, I decided to give myself a birthday gift for DeLanee's special day by making my own. So, although, it's not professional, I'm thankful for every little thing I have.

I'm sharing it here today with you. Happy Birthday to DeLanee!

"Loops for Logan"

One of the best parts about being involved with Lanee's Legacy is that we get the opportunity to meet amazingly people who are strong, who care and have big hearts who want to help. Marlo Alder is one of these people. I met Marlo in May of last year when she contacted me and shared her heartbreaking story with me. Marlo's story is exactly the reason why this organization exists. Our mission and purpose is to ensure that parents don't have experiences similar to her's. Since meeting Marlo, we have cried together, planned together, worked together, laughed together and planned some more! She is an amazing person that has had an incredible loss, had a less than perfect experience in the hospital at the time of her loss, but has turned her grief into something good that has helped others.

I'd like to share a little bit of Marlo's story by doing so in her own words. This was Marlo's first e-mail to me:

My name is Marlo Alder and I have followed your blog for some time now. I lost my baby back in November at TMC hospital in Tucson. My experience was so hard, I had HELLP syndrome at 17 weeks. They had to take our baby, we found out that we were having a baby boy just hours before we had him. What makes this harder is that we had done invitro to have this our third baby. Well, long story short, because we had lost the baby they had me go to the women's center to recover for 2 days. It was the most awful experience. I felt forgotten, alone {My husband was there, and was awesome!!}, and that nobody cared that I had just lost my baby. They gave me a box that had a bear and some papers about how to grieve. We didnt take any pictures, and did nothing special. We had no idea what to do. So I am writing you and asking if there is anything I can do in my area, so that people don't have to go through, what I had to. I live in Pima which is by Safford. The hospital is Mt. Graham. It's a small town and I don't know if there is any program here. I didn't deliver here, so I am not sure. I think what you are doing is so touching. I admire you and your love. Let me know. Thanks, Marlo.

Marlo did NOT receive one of Lanee's Legacy boxes. She did not have any items to help her capture precious memories with her son. She wasn't even given the opportunity to see him. She was caught in a whirlwind, not doing physically well herself and didn't have anything to help. When she first shared her experience with me, my heart broke. I'd never met her before, but I just wanted to reach out, grab her and hug her.

As our conversations continued, she told me how she was determined to ensure that no other mom had an experience such as her's. We planned a box making night in her area and left those boxes for her to deliver to her local hospital (Mt. Graham Medical Center). She has already felt her efforts come full circle as she has had friends experience a loss. How amazing for her to know that because of Logan and her efforts, those friends have been able to feel the love that she had for them by helping to create the boxes to ensure they were available for them when needed. What an amazing thing she has done!

Here's some pictures of our box making night in Pima, Arizona back in September, 2010:

It was an awesome turnout! One of our biggest groups to do boxes with. Not only did she have the women from her church group there, but the nursing department from her local college was there too. We felt so blessed to be a part of this night and to meet such amazing people!

Although her story is heartbreaking, her son, Logan, has had a tremendous effect on her life. Marlo is full of faith and Logan remains a big part of their family. She has turned her experience into something good by helping others and has made sure that Lanee's Legacy's boxes are now in the two hospitals she was in with the hope that no other mother will have to experience what she did.

Don't think that her story ends there! She has also organized a fundraiser in her town where the proceeds of what is earned will benefit Lanee's Legacy. I told you she's amazing, didn't I?!?

On January 22, 2010, there will be a charity roping called "Loops for Logan" that will be held at the Alder arena in Pima, Arizona. For those of you who are not familiar with what a "roping" is - - its a cowboy thing! Think two guys, each on a horse, roping a steer for the fastest time.

Marlo and her Husband are country people (who just so happen to be some of my favorite kind of people) and when she was thinking of how she could help raise funds for Lanee's Legacy's boxes, she thought of something that would fit into her life, something she knew about and would work for her! I love it!! I can't wait to attend this event and be a part of this celebration of Logan, who he is and the amazing Mother he has in planning and coordinating something so great for the benefit of others!

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In the meantime, if you'd like to help out with a box making we have 2 opportunities left in January.

January 20th - Suprise 1st Ward, 14916 N Sarival Avenue, Suprise, Arizona @ 7:00 p.m.

January 25th - Gilbert 9th Ward, 1150 E. Guadalupe, Gilbert, Arizona @ 7:00 p.m.

Feel free to come and help out. Any donations you bring will be greatly appreciated!

The Ultimate Gift

I can't believe that Christmas is just 6 days away. This past year has certainly flown by for me. I have a lot of memories that accompany Christmas. And it's interesting to me how Christmas changes for me a little bit each year.

As a child, it was all about the presents and the magic of Santa Claus. I was taught about the Savior's birth and true meaning of Christmas, but as a child I was focused on the material part of Christmas. Years later, I remember feeling let down as I realized Santa wasn't real but then excited to be my mom's elf to my little brother and sister. It was still about the presents though. Later, as I got married, it was fun to have my own little Christmas tree with my husband and create our own traditions. 3 years later, our first son came along and then it became ALL about him! That was so wonderful to experience Christmas through his eyes. It's truly a blessing to be able to see the magic come alive through a child.

7 years ago I was experiencing a very difficult Christmas. DeLanee was diagnosed on December 2nd of 2003. As a new mom, I was so full of excitement for the following Spring and the little life that was going to enter our family. In fact, I was so excited that I had already sent out my Christmas cards, decorated the house and bought presents - all before December. My anticipation of this little sweet baby growing inside of me had me very motivated!! There's just something about the promise of new life. On December 2nd all of those feelings were washed away and replaced with many others. My heart was filled with sorrow, frustration and even anger. I can't even describe the intensity of these emotions that I was feeling. They were overwhelming and all-consuming and any "Christmas spirit" that I was previously feeling was gone. To me, I no longer felt in the celebrating mood. I had a 3 year old at the time, so of course I had to "fake" my way through the month, but inside I felt like crawling in a hole until it all passed.

There is one particular Sunday before Christmas that stands out in my mind. On this day that I went to church, a sweet lady from our church was singing a solo called "Mary's Lullaby". Rebecca Barney has one of the most beautiful voices I have ever heard. I was already in such an emotionally fragile stage, but the beauty of the song along with her incredible talent melted my heart and I found myself sobbing. A friend of mine was sitting a little ways down and noticed that I was not doing such a good job of holding myself together and very subtly passed me a kleenex. I was so embarassed of my lack of composure and tried to do the best I could to hold it together, but the fact that she was passing me a kleenex made it apparent that I was NOT doing a very good job of it. I'm sure it wasn't pretty. If you haven't heard this song, it's such a sweet and tender song about Mary and how she felt about this most important little baby she had just given birth to. The part that always sticks out to me the most are the lyrics that say: ". . .for you are a king, but tonight you are mine".

When I hear this song, I think of Mary swaddling and holding her sweet baby, knowing how special he is and some of what is in store for him but not worrying about any of that for now, because. . . on that special night HE was HERS and that's all that mattered! I believe that she must have relished in that moment and the opportunity she had to love on him, sing lullabies and study every little feature on her sweet boy. Knowing what an important mission he had and that he would save the world must have compounded that love. I wish I had a download of the song I could share with you, but couldn't find a good version of it on the web. It's so beautiful. I love instrumental music and have been listening to a piano version of it on a CD by Marvin Goldstein called "The Greatest Gift". But Elise Adams also has a wonderful version of it on her CD and you can listen to a little snipit of it here.

Anyway, on that day, I couldn't help but think of my own baby and how I knew what was in store for her. I knew I wasn't going to keep her. I knew of her struggles and challenges that she was facing. . .but I too wanted her to be mine. . .if only for a short time. I wanted it sooooo badly and prayed that I would get to have some time with her. I feel so blessed to have gotten that opportunity. I know God must have known how important it was to me and I feel so blessed that I DID get a night with her. I will never forget how good it felt to hold her in my arms that night. I knew my time was going to be limited, but I was given the gift to hold her, love on her and have her be MINE for that night. It felt so good.

Today I went to church and again listened to this beautiful song. I was so glad that it was a part of the Christmas program because it has such a special place it my heart now and I love listening to it during Christmas. It was interesting though how today I sat in church and listened to this same song, but with a different ears.

This year has been a bit more emotional for me for some reason. It has been 7 years since DeLanee has passed away. Of course that first Christmas was extremely difficult, but each year has slowly gotten better. I'm not exactly sure why this one has been harder. I love everything about Christmas (except how hectic it can get). But what I love most is the opportunity to focus on the Savior and what His birth and life means to me. Actually, I think over these past 7 years I have developed a stronger appreciation and love for my brother, Jesus Christ, and what he has done for me and ALL of us. He paid the greatest price to give us the ultimate gift. . .eternal life. Eternal life and the opportunity to be with our loved ones again. Words cannot express how grateful I am to Him for this. So, now when I think of Christmas, I not only think of the Savior's birth, but his life and more importantly his atonement for the world which means that I can be with my daughter again. . .and not just for a night - but forever, and that is the ULTIMATE GIFT!

This is the knowledge that I find rest in. This is the truth that comforts me. I know the burden of grief and how it can bring us to our knees. It's my prayer that if you are feeling the heartache and loneliness that comes from losing a loved one that you may be able to to feel the gift that our Savior gave us and that is the assurance that life is everlasting. In that we can find peace and comfort.

John 14: 7: Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

Opportunity to Serve

We wanted to make you aware of an upcoming box assembly that will be taking place on this Thursday, December 16th, 2010 at 7:00 p.m.

Rebecca Smith, a fellow recipient of a box, has organized this project and has invited her friends and family but has also opened up the night to EVERYONE that would like to come and particpate. We would love to have you come and help us in this evening of service if you are able.

The project will take place at: 3580 E Houston Ave, Gilbert, AZ 85234. It is on Houston between Higley and Recker.

We will have everything we need to complete 40 boxes (20 boy/20 girl) on this night and it is not required that you bring anything to participate. However, if you would like to donate any items that are included in our boxes, we will have a donation bucket available and would love to have any support you are able to contribute to future boxes. If you would like to see a list of these items, you can find it to the right of our blog.

If you have any questions, just let us know. Hope to see you all there!

2nd Annual Pancake Breakfast Fundraiser

I can't believe it has taken us a month to get the pictures up of our breakfast! I'm so sorry it's been so long. Not only was our 2nd annual pancake breakfast a success, but the 2nd annual sickness in the Norris household was too. UGH! Last year after the breakfast I got REALLY sick and this year was no different. . .except the rest of my family got it as well. Anyway, between that and Thanksgiving and being out of town, this last month has just flown by.

Our breakfast was wonderful and the day was filled with fun, remembrance, celebration and reflection. There are so many people that made this day possible, from our sponsors, volunteers, business owners that donated items, caterer, emcee and many, many others. It takes so many people to make something like this happen and we appreciate each and every one of you that came and supported us in whatever capacity you did.

Here's some of the highlights from the day:

One of our super cute helpers, Brock Sherwood:

We displayed this poster at the ticket line. It shows which hospitals we currently serve - 18 total. It also says that as of the date of the breakfast we had donated 421 boxes totaling $10,525.00. Those numbers are already outdated and we continue to climb.

Here's our breakfast set up before everyone arrived:

Part of the breakfast crew:

We displayed some of our boxes that we have donated this past year:

Here's a few of the girls who helped us sell tickets and raffles: Summer Shiflet, Bekki Webb and Charlee Haueter. Thanks so much girls!!

Here's some pictures of our silent auction. WOW! We ended up with over 20 different silent auction packages. This was a huge success and help for our fundraising! Thanks to our business owners for donating such great items and for everyone who bid on them!

Our raffle was great as well with approximately 55 raffle prizes. Here's a few of them:

Thank you to the Mesa Fire Department for bringing their fire truck and contributing to our event! Love you guys!!

We were so honored to have Kevin Burdick as our emcee and performer this year. What a great person he is! He has a HUGE heart and such a spirit of giving. We were certainly blessed to have him with us that day. Not only that, but he is SUPER funny! We were cracking up at him all day!

Here he is performing his song in honor of his daughter, Dempsey Burdick, called "Too Good For This World". Beautiful!

We heard from both a bereaved mom and a bereavement coordinator at our breakfast. We appreciated their words and support.

This is Jamilyn Craig. We just love her. She does so much within the baby loss community to support and give back. She so beautifully shared the story of her sweet boys (2 losses - 9 years apart) and her experience. We appreciate her so much and her willingness to open her life and let us be a part of her story.

Karen Lee represented the Banner Hospitals and spoke about her experience in giving the boxes to families. We appreciated her words of encouragement and support to us.

Have we mentioned how much we LOVE the Mesa Host Lions Club?? Oh my gosh. . .we love these guys! They have a been a huge support to us and we look forward to when we get to spend some time with them. Wonderful, wonderful people!

The rest of these pictures are fun pictures throughout the day. Jump and Shout Play Center provided our bounce houses. Arizona Game and Fish was there with animals including, snakes, birds, owls, lizards, etc. We had awesome balloon twisters and face painters that the kids absolutely loved! Here's just some random shots:

I love how this sweet boy is eating his pancakes and sausage sandwich style. Awesome!

A fellow mom that has also experienced a heart breaking loss. She drove a very long way to come support us this day. It means a lot! Kelly Hatch and her cute daughter, Jerzie.

Dr. Gandhi from Phoenix Perinatal Associates:

Last, but not least, we were both suprised and honored to have this young man, Nathan Helbig, arrive at our breakfast with BOXES of donations and $500.00 in cash!!! He did an amazing job in doing this project for his Eagle Scout. We were so impressed with everything he accomplished and thank him for everything he donated for our boxes!!